Just Try

Hello, long time no see. The kids are keeping me busy during the afternoon and evenings. During the day I spend it keeping the house clean, preparing dinner and generally taking care of myself. I need to find a happy medium for blog time as well. Everything else has seemed to find its niche.

Culture Club - "Time (Clock Of The Heart)"

DJ was invited to sing at his vocal coach's recital in September. We are all very excited for him. She admitted that its not her practice to have first year students perform but she thinks he'll shine. The Ware house is very excited for him. Especially his sister Sasha who has been bragging to anyone and everyone who will listen.


We were actually a bit concerned about how Sasha would deal with all this attention on her brother. So far she's handling it well. 

To think it all started with Uncle Paul playing this song:

Depeche Mode - "Condemnation"

We may have discovered her talent. She had expressed interest in ice skating but with the nearest rink an hour away we didn't know how interested she really was. It now appears her father would drop her off with her coach two days a week near Los Angeles while he worked in the afternoons. Then he'd watch her for an hour practicing. She had been skating in pairs with a seven year old boy. She never volunteered that Dahy had dropped her off at the rink until last week when I pushed her after she told me again she liked to skate. This time I asked her when she'd gone, and she replied "all the time". I asked a few more probing questions and it all came out. Finally when told her that I had no idea she told me since I was good friends with her Daddy she assumed I'd known. That's when I had the first Paul-is-not-a-mind-reader speech. 

Falco - "Rock Me Amadeus (Original Single Version)"

After some well placed phone calls, I was able to get through to her pairs coach. She had wondered why Sasha had stopped coming so suddenly, and why her mother never returned her calls after her missed lessons. I explained that Sasha had been with her father his last week, and soon after staying with us. Sasha's partner had already moved on to train with another girl. She's not working out well with him, and his mother said she'd much prefer to start him up with Sasha again. Now if we can only get her custom skates from her former home, that would be a blessing. If not, we'll take the money for her new skates from the estate her father left her. She had just finished breaking in her last pair, though, so we want to avoid that if possible. In the meantime I renewed her annual Figure Skating Club membership card so she will be able to test when she is ready.


Sasha's coach had expressed real sadness over Dahy's death. He had left a very favourable impression on her. Not just as a skating parent as a person in general. 

West Side Story - "America"

The move looks like it will probably be a "go". A woman Jane knows from work wants a smaller house and with three children we need a bigger one. The plan is for us to pay the difference with a loan from her parents and then tie our mortgage onto the new property. The appraisers came earlier this week, and Monday we have an appointment to have the bank go over our new property.

Billy Idol - "Mony Mony (Live)"

Also on the horizon early next month is our visit to Corrine, their grandmother, who lives in West Belfast. She is a bit frightened only having flown twice (the first time was to meet Jane and see Dahy) so she'll be flying back with us and staying for a few weeks in the summer.  I've already starting cleaning out my library to convert it back to a bedroom for her stay. On top of all this, Corrine has already offered to come out when Baby Ware is born to help raise the twins while Jane and I adjust to him/her. Talk about a blessing in disguise. If this June works out well, we may take her up on the offer. 

Soulsavers - "Just Try"

My current favourite Soulsavers song. I know that I've been pounding them down your throat but I haven't heard an album as good as "The Light the Dead See"  in several years. It also came out at a time in my life when I am also spending a lot of time looking at my own spirituality. The great thing about this album is that it isn't so much as in belief in God, but is simply about a search for "God, as you understand him." If you recognize that last phrase, you will probably get quite a bit from this album. I believe that's why I can't stop playing it, the music feels as if its about my journey as well.


To those of you who leave comments, they brighten my day. Thanks. 

Catch Paul Ware on Facebook or Twitter. I can also be reached via email (delete no spam) but much prefer the Facebook message option. The comments section is fine too.

Want to know when the next blog is coming out or recommend it to a friend? There is an easy Facebook page for that now.

Letting Go

I'm sitting here with my cat next to me sleeping. She's sixteen years old, with arthritis and early dementia. She has let me know she's getting ready to go.

Real Life-"Send Me An Angel"

She spent all of today on the heating pad and could barely lift her head. Tonight she got up to eat some wet food, groomed herself and used her box. Then she fell back asleep. Her eyes have lost their sparkle. 

Howard Jones-"No One Is To Blame"

I've had my baby almost my entire life in the States. I got her my first year here and she has seen more changes in me than anybody. She's survived three apartments before my house, as well as two girlfriends before my wife. 

She saw me long before I started showing symptoms of Huntington's, and when I was a lot less stable in my personal life. She saw me stop drinking and finish my education. 

A twist on the Double Feature:

Today I'll be playing the same song by
both songwriters.

First up Terry Hall with Fun Boy Three

with the 1982 hit song in the UK where it went to number 7

Fun Boy Three-"Our Lips Are Sealed"

While they were in the studio, co-songwriter Jane Wiedlan and company

were having a hit over the pond in the US. 

All the way to number 15 it was:

The Go Gos-"Our Lips Are Sealed"

This is one song that always takes me back to a softer, easier time. When I was a young boy and had a carefree life, no real responsibilities and both of my parents were there to support me. A time when I hadn't heard of Huntington's Disease and life seemed like it would go on forever.

Falco-"Rock Me Amadeus (Symphonic)

Does this man have a stage presence or what?

I never knew before tonight. 

The mix of electronics and the orchestra is amazing.

This is another song I associate with carefree times. I went to the club and this was always playing, It was crazy to be dancing to the American version of a song in German by an Austrian but we sure rocked the house along with Falco and Amadeus. 

Eurythmics-"Love Is a Stranger"

I think a large part of my early grieving is that when my cat goes I will have lost the last tie to the period in my life when I was quite a bit irresponsible, when the world was at my feet. By letting go of her, I'm letting go of that part of my life to an extent.

Pet Shop Boys-"Opportunities(Let's Make A Lot of Money)"

There is video footage of them performing this song live. It is only the second live performance I'm aware of in which the keyboardist uses the Fairlight CMI. That was a very expensive piece so most bands did not tour with it. The only other place I'm aware of that I've seen it live was The Cars' performance at Live Aid.

This last song really encapsulates how I'm feeling these last few days. I'll leave you with Depeche Mode.

The Rumour

This is a mini-movie made to Depeche Mode's Blasphemous  Rumours

"I don't want to start any blasphemous Rumours

But I think God has a sick sense of humour

And when I die I expect to find him laughing"

. 

Catch Paul Ware on Facebook or Twitter. I can also be reached via email (delete no spam) but much prefer the Facebook message option. The comments section is fine too.

Want to know when the next blog is coming out or recommend it to a friend? There is an easy Facebook page for that now.

Morning All

After playing "Space Age Love Song" by Flock of Seagulls I've been stuck with their other song, "I Ran" in my head. So for the sake that I can get that piece of crap out of my head here it is. 

A Flock of Seagulls-"I Ran"

I'm cutting back on my Twitter time today. I found myself justifying my use by deflecting. Wrong way to go, Paul. It was like the time I said I'm not an alcoholic while I justified my drinking by switching from Beer to Bachardi (Yeap, I did that one).  That means I have to make sure I don't slide over to Facebook.  

I'm the king of parallel addictions. I was actually reading that alcoholism and drug addiction have a higher rate in Huntington's Disease patients. If true, it would not  shock me. In my case I was drinking when a late teen and then just kept drinking until I had tried to take my life. Since then I've maintained some good sobriety. 

I do know that as an HD patient I'm going to loose a parent, which to the average person is a known stressor. I'm also suffering from compulsive thoughts and actions which I take medication for. I'm also planning on starting a new type of therapy for this and we'll see how that works next week.

craigslist tv: Drinking Buddy

I love this show. As someone commented it should be on those ads where they justify the existence of the internet.

Men Without Hats-"Safety Dance": 

I'm having troubles sleeping since I stopped the Lyrica. That was a powerful knock out drug and my body misses it. Right now I'm wishing my eyes were closed and I was dreaming of this little village.

Nena-"99 Luft Baloons"

My whole body is screaming to sleep but I can't cross the line to the nice sleepy clouds 

Eddy Grant-"Electric Avenue"

Eddy puts me in the mood to watch some Ross Kemp in Jamaica. If you haven't seen him I highly recommend it for good entertainment. 

 Falco-"Rock Me Amadeus"

This is one of those songs that good speakers were bought for. 

Kim Carnes-"Bette Davis Eyes"

Sleep, come to me. I'm calm enough now DAMMIT! 

I'm really not going to get this, am I? Its time for me to settle down with my phone and read a book on the Kindle. 

Morning all!

Catch Paul Ware on Facebook or Twitter. I can also be reached via email (delete no spam) but much prefer the Facebook message option.