Saturday 24 December 2011

Huntington's Doesn't Take a Holiday

Mood 4.0
Anxiety 4.5


Its my honeymoon and I've been locked in bed all day. What gives?

Before I left I amped up all my medication. This is a very hard time of year and I didn't want anything to get in the way of my honeymoon. I did pretty good until earlier today, the 23rd

The Pregnant Everly Brothers-"Common People"
Local Sheffield Band

I woke up this morning with my mood dropping quickly. I was depressed with a capital D. The first thing I did was get some food down me. By the time we were done eating my mood wasn't getting better but in fact I was near tears. I excused myself and left to go back to our hotel room which had been serving several purposes including rest stop so I didn't burn out from pushing myself too hard during the day.

Mormon Tabernacle Choir - "Do you Hear What I Hear"

So here I am at the Grand Californian smack dab inside a Disneyland Park and I can't get out of the bathroom.Actually, I choose not to leave it. My wife doesn't need to see me cry on our honeymoon.

Christmas at the Grand Californian 2009 
(Thanks to Mice Age for the photograph)

Tonight's Double Feature: Andrea Borceli
Gloria in Excelsis Deo-Andrea Borcelli

After being able to dry the tears I left to enter our room again. By then Jane was reading my Kindle so I picked up my telephone and got on Twitter. 

Andrea Borceli-"Handel's Hallelujah (Sacred Arias)" 

After half an hour just laying on the bed doing our own things and enjoying the quiet company of each other, my depression turned into my gut like a nasty skeleton key into paralyzing anxiety. I crawled onto the bed, laid down on my side and stayed there frozen.

It took two doses of Xanax before the anxiety subsided to a controlled state. At that point I was able to read. Yes, it took that much medication for me to be able to put two sentences together. 

Cranberries-"Little Drummer Boy"

This went on throughout the evening. I'd be able to dose enough to get a specific task completed before I would freak out again. The anxiety didn't break until 1 am, four hours ago. 

The good news is that it did break, and we have a few more days to enjoy each other's company before its back to the old grind. Let me tell you, though, I really wish Huntington's had decided to take a holiday.

Amy Winehouse-"I saw Mummy Kissing Santa Claus" 

Merry Christmas

Catch Paul Ware on Facebook or Twitter. I can also be reached via email (delete no spam) but much prefer the Facebook message option. The comments section is fine too. 

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