Next up, I'm exhausted. I'm beyond exhausted. I'm sick to my gut and was only able to keep soup down last night. I felt terrible as my girlfriend (as Facebook nicely says "It's Complicated") had made a nice dinner. I felt just awful. Then today before the plumber came back I made it to my dad's and to the bank to get my current living will notarized. Now I need to xerox it and mail it to the California Secretary of State. I recently discovered in California you don't need to be a citizen to take advantage of this service. For ten dollars I'll have an Advance Directive that "moves around the state" with me, that is peace of mind.
This is the Future, a band made up of Martyn Ware and Ian Curtis Marsh of Heaven 17 before they added a vocalist to become The Human League. Ware and Marsh left several years later, when Philip Oakey took the The League's name, large debts to Virgin Records and added Sue Anne Sulley and Joanne Catherall to cover for the now lack of Ware's higher tone backing vocals. I really like The Future's sound.
I went down for my nap after the plumber left and woke up early, it was 5 p.m. but felt like I'd slept so late I missed dinner. What scared the crap out of me was before I'd even opened my eyes I was thinking to myself "Enough of this, I give up." Its times like this I am so very thankful I'm not living alone. I immediately told her what I was thinking and she's brushing it up to the remnants of my old carb heavy diet combined with lack of nutrition the last two days. I hope she's right, but I know who to call if I need professional help which is half the battle.
Then I drank some Gatorade to be safe until I ate dinner. I've been in a bit, okay a lot, of pain the last few days as well and the pain meds I take upset my stomach. I wasn't the brightest bulb on the block when I refused to take my anti-nausea pill. Its in the family of anti-psychotics as most of them are, and make me uncomfortable. Tales of things which may come in the future so-to-speak have a tendency to spook me. As a consequence my anti-depressant and mood-stabilizers came up at night. Next time I'm taking Naproxen instead of the narcotic. This is a second time since January I've had trouble with a narcotic pain killer.
For all I know the depression could be a blood sugar issue or med withdrawal. Just in case I need to make an appointment Monday to see the doctor about blood work.
. Berlin- The Metro
While waiting for the bus (I didn't feel safe to drive today) I was reading an interesting piece in Trish Dainton's book Curse in Verse & Much More Worse (pg 92) today that really struck home. According to a prominent HD researcher the unknown part of the brain that enjoys and appreciates music does not turn off in the degeneration of Huntington's Disease.
I think the premise of this blog is proof of this!