Tuesday, 31 January 2012

Letting Go

I'm sitting here with my cat next to me sleeping. She's sixteen years old, with arthritis and early dementia. She has let me know she's getting ready to go.

Real Life-"Send Me An Angel"

She spent all of today on the heating pad and could barely lift her head. Tonight she got up to eat some wet food, groomed herself and used her box. Then she fell back asleep. Her eyes have lost their sparkle. 

Howard Jones-"No One Is To Blame"

I've had my baby almost my entire life in the States. I got her my first year here and she has seen more changes in me than anybody. She's survived three apartments before my house, as well as two girlfriends before my wife. 

She saw me long before I started showing symptoms of Huntington's, and when I was a lot less stable in my personal life. She saw me stop drinking and finish my education. 

A twist on the Double Feature:
Today I'll be playing the same song by
both songwriters.
First up Terry Hall with Fun Boy Three
with the 1982 hit song in the UK where it went to number 7
Fun Boy Three-"Our Lips Are Sealed"

While they were in the studio, co-songwriter Jane Wiedlan and company
were having a hit over the pond in the US. 
All the way to number 15 it was:
The Go Gos-"Our Lips Are Sealed"

This is one song that always takes me back to a softer, easier time. When I was a young boy and had a carefree life, no real responsibilities and both of my parents were there to support me. A time when I hadn't heard of Huntington's Disease and life seemed like it would go on forever.

Falco-"Rock Me Amadeus (Symphonic)
Does this man have a stage presence or what?
I never knew before tonight. 
The mix of electronics and the orchestra is amazing.

This is another song I associate with carefree times. I went to the club and this was always playing, It was crazy to be dancing to the American version of a song in German by an Austrian but we sure rocked the house along with Falco and Amadeus. 

Eurythmics-"Love Is a Stranger"

I think a large part of my early grieving is that when my cat goes I will have lost the last tie to the period in my life when I was quite a bit irresponsible, when the world was at my feet. By letting go of her, I'm letting go of that part of my life to an extent.

Pet Shop Boys-"Opportunities(Let's Make A Lot of Money)"

There is video footage of them performing this song live. It is only the second live performance I'm aware of in which the keyboardist uses the Fairlight CMI. That was a very expensive piece so most bands did not tour with it. The only other place I'm aware of that I've seen it live was The Cars' performance at Live Aid.

This last song really encapsulates how I'm feeling these last few days. I'll leave you with Depeche Mode.

The Rumour
This is a mini-movie made to Depeche Mode's Blasphemous  Rumours
"I don't want to start any blasphemous Rumours
But I think God has a sick sense of humour
And when I die I expect to find him laughing"

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  1. Symbolism is an interesting thing. I'm one who has trouble throwing away things that someone meaningful has given me or using up the last bit of something I like. That said - while I completely understand, I want you to know that you are not losing yourself, your soul.


  2. Pets are members of the family, and losing them is no easier than losing anyone else. I'm so sorry Paul.